|
|
- Gentlemen,
I am deeply concerned to see that Drunken Master now has his own
column. Whereas in the past Mr. Master tended to go off the handle on
a number of occasions with his movie reviews, there was at least some
relevance to film review within (however difficult it was to discern).
This new Corporate forum of his is however quite a different beast. I
fail to see what his utter lack of compassion at work has to do with
film reviews. I find his personal views tasteless and offensive. I do
not care how his day at work went or how he feels about overweight
individuals. I only come to your site to see movie reviews. Please, I
urge you to rethink giving Mr. Master his own forum. It can only serve
in bringing down the overall quality of Movie Pit. Now, let’s
spend more time reviewing film and less time ranting about one’s sorry
lot in life.
I would offer Mr. Master a word of helpful advice. No one is making
you work with these “village idiots” as you call them. If you feel
your vast resources of computer expertise are being wasted at your
current position, then move on, you sorry ass son of a bitch.
Sincerely,
Clark Foreman
Clark,
When was the last time you got laid? I don't mean fucked your wife in
the standard male dominance position...I mean really fucked something
hard, good, thorough? I have my doubts buddy, that you ever had. You
sound like one of these ass fucking pedophiles that are penetrating at
an alarming rate of young males in the priesthood. So Whassup, you
fucked any good ass lately? I'm thinking some eleven year old Baptists
are in your future.....possibly some ten year old Lutheran ass. Ever
watched young boys play soccer, the sweat glistening off their young
nubile bodies as they sprint downfield through the summer breeze. Their
tight chests intaking and exhaling short explosive breaths of
air.......So in retrospect Mr. Pope wannabe, Mr. Asspipe shaft
giver.........You wanna talk about one's sorry lot in life. Well pull
your sorry lot out of whomever your piping, and take a good look hard
look in the mirror. No....Don't do that, continue your assfucking ways,
so that I will always have someone to trash in moments like this. ASS
FUCK, my loser respondee, ass fuck......No one is making me work with
these "Village Idiots"....WHAT DRUGS ARE YOU ON....I Don't hire this ass
wipe rejects....I get PAID, these fucks are temps....tissue paper, the
ass wads I wipe my ass with on any given moment. I have more of an
intelligent thought in utter drunkenness than these wads have in their
entire existence....I AM A GOD!!!!!
--Drunken Master
- To whom it may concern,
My husband and I have a curious 6 year old boy. While checking your
fine site "Movie Pit" for the latest professional reviews of the
current releases, we left the room for a moment only to return finding
little Daniel reading your new Mail Forum section. Imagine my
husband's surprise when Daniel asked him what a "sorry ass limp dick
ankle grabbing" person was? You should all be ashamed of
yourselves, especially you Drunken Master. Didn't your parents teach
you any manners? I'll have you know you have just lost yourselves one
family's patronage.
Good riddance.
Name withheld, blah, blah, blah.
Dearest Limp Dick Grabber,
Your son is simply as interested in this as you seem to be. I can
honestly say that I didn't know what one of these types of people were
until college. Therefore you as a parent must SUCK because you're child
is learning from a website instead from the proper learning channels
such as yourself......If you can't raise it yourself, sell it on the
black market you fucking dumbass piece of shit. I ain't got time to
teach your offspring of your fat loving the time of day..... Understand?
--Drunken Master
- Mr. Jurassic,
I was reading your review of Flash Gordon and noticed the word gaydar
and was confused. What is gaydar?
--name & e-mail withheld by request.
Dear Name Withheld by request,
Since I don't know your exact age, I am unsure how to answer your
question regarding my gaydar. If you are willing to answer the following
questions (care of Movie Pit e-mail), I can give you a more thorough
response:
1) Have you ever seen a grown man naked?
2) Do you like movies about gladiators?
3) Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?
Please submit these answers personally addressed to Jurassic Mark (along
with a photo) and I will be sure and get back with you.
Sincerely,
Jurassic Mark
- To the person who so irresponsibly calls himself Drunken Master,
I read your review of Demolition Man and it was a disgrace. You need
to get involved in a 12 step program and clean up your potty mouth.
Also please change your name to something more positive. If you are
serious about change I have some Christian tapes you can borrow.
--name withheld by request.
To NWBR,
Dearest Artfag, to whom shall I direct my taunting.. NAME WITHHELD BY
REQUEST......You sir are an imBecile, that's right an ImBecile. You want
12 steps mother fucker, I got them 12 steps, it's called a twelve pack
and I got plenty more from whence they came you piss ant sorry ass cock
sucker. You think I have a fucking potty mouth for normal reviews, well
wait till I get ahold of your sorry ass limp dick ankle grabbing young
loving personal opinion of one other than yourself. "And Jesus
Said....." Don't fuck with me self righteous boy....I'll go off on a
tangent on your ass and you won't know what hit you. You want a review
by a drunken idiot....WELL PISSANT, THIS IS THE SHIT.
--Drunken Master
- To that dumbass Randolph Carter,
Like you know Duets is like my totally favorite movie of all time
and I think you giving it the finger just like sucks. I think you
should watch it again like for real. I think you'll like change
your mind or something. What kind of name is Randolph Carter
anyway? It's like so stupid. All the other guys have kewl names,
but yours makes no sense. Whatever!
-- name withheld by request.
Whoever you are (a goofy girl I
would presume), please die. I stand by my review of Duets as an F plus
the ol' finger. This was one painfully bad piece of shit film. If I can
make it through the rest of the year without having to watch another
film as bad as this, I'll die a happy man. Don't you worry your pretty
little empty head about where the name Randolph Carter comes from. Cool
or not, rest assured I'll continue to take my job seriously, sniff out
the crap flicks as early as possible and hopefully stop others from
wasting their valuable time watching them.
Yours truly,
RC
If you want to contribute to the wisdom of the
ages.
|